Life, a Tribute, and Goodbye
As it turns out, the first month of 2017 has not been exactly the kindest we could have imagined. First, it’s been damn cold! I’ve seen far, far worse when I lived in Regina back as a kid, but the past couple of years the winters have been really warm, so we got spoiled.
This is nothing, what really made the month so hard and it’s just halfway through is the fact that we lost my mom on Sunday, January 15th, at 4:15 in the morning.
She was very strong and by rights should have passed away back in 2004, when she had slipped into a coma for several months and lost part of her intestinal tract, but she recovered. It was also at that time she had to be placed in a nursing home, as there was no way in hell we could have taken care of her.
Then last January, almost to the day, she was diagnosed with breast cancer and given 6-12 months to live.
What was really great about this though is instead of being upset or the like, I had rarely ever seen her this happy! We never talked about her passing away, but she knew it was coming, and she was ready for it, and grateful her time was coming to an end.
See, she has suffered from a rare genetic disorder called osteogenesis imperfecta. It’s a nasty genetic disorder which cause her bones to be very brittle, among many other complications. As such, she has been in constant pain her entire life! And she’s broken more bones than you can possibly imagine.
On top of this, she had to deal with an abusive father, and suffered from anxiety and emotional trauma. Back in the day, she had been committed to an asylum and ‘treated’ with electroshock therapy.
This left her with a lot of actual mental damage and she suffered memory loss - and worse.
To top it off, I was the only one of six pregnancies which came to term.
She had a very hard life. Needless to say she often did and said things she did not mean, and could not control herself.
Growing up with her was difficult, and that is an understatement. I got into all the things I love – games, rpgs, books, comics, and so on as an escape from what was a hard and oft unpleasant life.
Yes I was resentful – hell lets be honest… I was filled with hate. It wasn’t until I got into my late twenties or early thirties that I finally found out the truth, found out about almost everything I have just shared.
These facts really opened my eyes and allowed me to see past the hurt and anger I felt, and for the first time ever, I understood why things were the way they were.
And yes I felt exceptionally guilty.
I wanted to try and make up for the years of not knowing or understanding, and after we nearly lost her back in 2004, we decided to make a change.
We did not spend as much time as we should have, and always came up with excuses, but still we went to see her. We went out of our way to make sure she had everything she could have wanted or needed.
As I said, she was happy near the end, more than I have ever seen during the time we had together.
And when the end came, it was – thankfully – fast. She was fine, happy and strong at Christmas and New Years, and even the first week of January. Then it hit and within five days she passed. There was little pain, and for the most part she was comfortable.
For that I am more grateful than you can imagine. At least the pain is gone and for those who believe, she’s in a far better place. I know she wouldn’t be in hell, not after living in hell for her entire life. She did what she could to raise me, to care for me and despite her many failings, she did a pretty good job.
God won’t punish her for what she did or had to endure.
I’m glad I was able to see the situation for what it was and get past everything.
So today as I post this blog, in a few hours we will be going to see her for one last time before she is cremated, as per her wishes.
Goodbye, mom. I love you and I miss you. I’m sorry I wasn’t a better son to you, but at least you’re happy now and never have to deal with suffering ever again.
So – now that is complete, it’s time to get to the usual stuff I talk about. This marks the third week I’ve written up Statistics for my New Mutant Monday Pathfinder series. Of course I still provide the OSR stats, but I’m getting more proficient with writing up Pathfinder stats. I still have a long way to go, but the mistakes are becoming less and less with each creation.
This week’s creations – Cyclopian (and the Pathfinder version), and Terror Seeds (with the Pathfinder version).
And my Wednesday’s Wondrous Works includes the Woodland Strider Boots.
Even though my blog is three days late, I won’t include this week’s creations until next week.
As usual I did manage to finish a couple of novels. I finished the Anthology novel Shadowed Souls, which contained a mess of Urban Fantasy short stories, including one from Jim Butcher and Kevin J. Anderson. I really enjoyed all the offerings from this anthology and it certainly left me with a hankering for more Harry Dresden novels. It’s been far too damn long since the last one came out.
Were there short stories in the anthology which will make me go out and find the author’s other works? I’m not a huge fan of urban fantasy, and it was a real fight for my friends to get me into the Dresden Files, so with the exception of the very last story in the anthology – no.
Don’t get me wrong, it was a great series of stories! Worth reading, believe me.
Also I finished Star Wars: Catalyst by James Luceno. This deals with Jyn’s parents and the events leading up to Rogue One. All the major characters are included in the novel, and their stories are beautifully fleshed out. The novel was really well written and I strongly recommend reading this before you see Rogue One.
Hell, read it even after seeing the movie. It adds so much to the overall story!
I also finished season 3 of The Last Ship. As with the first two seasons, this one covered pretty much a single story arch. The newly rebuilt US government is desperately trying to send the cure for the plague all across the globe, while having to deal with infighting among the five territory governors for manpower and resources.
It appears as if the cure is not working, the cure which has been spread with the help of the Chinese government. As a result, Japan is all but wiped out and Vietnam looks to be next on the target list.
The Nathan James and the crew are sent to investigate and see what can be done.
The first six episodes deal with one problem, while the rest of the season deals with a potential Coup in the states and the Chinese which are on track to committing genocide across Asia.
The action was intense! The characters so well portrayed you WANTED to see them dead, and sympathised with others you should by rights have hated.
Still one of my favorite shows and I am so damn glad it has been renewed for a 4th season.
Oh yeah… one of the images I used for this blog show NECA’s new Aliens figure line. What is neat about this line is they are actually reproductions of a series of Aliens toys which came out many years ago.
Much to my surprise, since I’m a bit of an Aliens fan, is the toys were produced for what was supposed to be a Aliens cartoon which never got off the ground. Oh it probably would have been terrible, but I have no doubt I would have watched it.
Here is the link to the article about the failed cartoon and the connection to the toy line. Thanks to Eric Fabiaschi for the link!
Also I started to watch a Chinese made and produced series called Ice Fantasy. My wife and I are currently two episodes into a 60 plus episode series and it’s kind of neat.
This is a high magic fantasy environment, unlike Game of Thrones, which would be considered low fantasy.
Visually, the costumes are beautiful, and the sets and scenery are impressive!
The computer graphics.... mediocre, not terrible but not what we're used to seeing.
Some of the props are so terrible I burst out laughing... in the first episode there was a fake sheep, and it was so obvious!
Typical story, but after watching the two episodes, I am interested enough to continue watching.
It is available on Netflix Canada for sure, not sure if it's available through Netflix in the states though, since the programming is so different.
Check it out.
No new releases from Skirmisher this week, but that is mainly because Michael Varhola is off on a cruise, giving lectures and touring Asia. I’m jealous! He’s getting a chance to see a lot of wonderful sites!
And he’ll even be stopping in my adoptive homeland, the Philippines for a short period of time.
Oh, speaking of, I posted the image of Cheonsa, Ronnath’s Tiefling daughter on the Pathfinder FB page. It’s been getting a ton of love, and what makes me so happy is the artist, Alfonso Maesa, has managed to get a couple of commissions as a result!
I should have done this years ago!
I’m going to share more of his work over the next few weeks as a result and see if I can get him more work.
And there you have it. I’m finished once again.
Next week’s blog should be on time.
Stay happy, stay strong and continue to enjoy life!
It can be too damn short.
