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Funeral and Cultural Observations

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A few days late but that should be expected considering the circumstances. We have now been in the Philippines for a full week, although nearly a day and a half of that was spent flying and stop-overs.

Funerals here are quite different from what I was expecting. I have been to only one funeral and that was back in 2011 when a longtime friend passed away from a heart condition. It was a simple thing, the funeral was held in the funeral home and we took his ashes to the cemetery. After that it was a matter of the wake, which was only a couple of hours, and we were done.

Dad’s body has been embalmed (took place right after his passing) and his body has now been on display in his coffin in the living room of our parent’s house. It has been here since about the 9th of August and will remain here until Saturday the 23rd, at which time we will be taking him to his crypt, which is his final resting place.

So that is but the first of the differences that I am facing when it comes to funerals here. The second is what I consider to be the incomprehensible rules that we have to follow. We’re not allowed to cut our hair, shave, trim our nails and other little things inside the house.

I have no idea why this is. My wife can’t even explain it to me! So if I want to shave or trim my nails I have to go to one of our relatives places in the next town over in order to do so. Believe me I want to shave. I have so much grey in my whiskers that I look like I’m about sixty if I don’t. And I’m pretty vain so I don’t want to look that old.

Every night mom and most of the rest of the family hold a vigil and go through a long series of prayers over his body. It’s kind of sad for me to watch this as it looks very painful for some of them, especially mom. My personal view on this is that it seems to be extending the grieving period. I have to say that this has to be a cultural thing and I just don’t understand it.

When I finally shake off this mortal coil and go onto my next life, I just want it to be over with quickly and I want those who love me to get on with their lives. Of course I don’t want to be forgotten (although that will eventually happen, since I’ve never made any major impact on a global scale), but at the same time I want my family and friends to continue with their lives and to get past my eventual death.

Simply put, I don’t want them to drag it out.

Although and this is something people might find strange, when I do die, I think I want to be buried here in the Philippines. The reason is very simple. Here I have a family, here I have people who love me and want nothing but happiness for me. Back home in Canada the only family I have is my wife, son and elderly mother. I have no family there and few people who give a damn about me.

I’d rather my mortal remains be here, where I will eventually be joined by my wife, and be remembered and missed.

I know, morbid and strange to be sure but it’s the way I feel.

Other things that I have witnessed that seem odd to me is that every night there are lots of visitors. That in of itself is not strange, but what they do baffles my mind. They gamble! Of all the things that they do, they gamble and a great deal. I’ve heard that some of the guys who come to play cards here have lost upwards of a month’s wages or more. It starts in the early evening and can go straight through until the next morning. Needless to say it can be rather difficult to sleep with them shouting and having fun.

What the hell does that have to do with funerals?!?

But on the other hand I do see the fact that it allows people, many of whom have not seen one another in years, to reconnect and of course there is the fact that they are remembering dad and sharing stories from his long life and showing him respect and love as well.

But gambling? I just don’t get it.

At least it’s not like a Irish wake – there would be tons of drunks and probably more than a few fights. =)

By the time I compose my next blog my dad will have finally been interred in his crypt, so I can then write about what I have witnessed then.

As for writing, I’ve managed to get another conversion posted, from the Alex Hunter series by Greig Beck. It’s another super-soldier. I have another three conversions that I hope to write up and post before I post my next blog.

There is something that I had been considering for quite a few months as well. I wrote up quite a number of weapons for the various Wisdom from the Wastelands issues that are current for sale and I won’t lie that many of the weapons were ‘borrowed’ or inspired by video games.

I’ve taken this one step further. I’m going to write up direct conversions of many of the weapons from games and post them on the D-Infinity site. In fact I started that last night with the first of many weapons from the much loathed Aliens: Colonial Marines game. It is the M4A3 service pistol.

Unlike my monster conversions, these conversions will be mainly crunch and stats, with a little bit of a write-up for each.

No I will not be doing these every day. A few a week is the best that people can expect from me. But since I have so many games that I have played and enjoyed, that still means there will be a LOT of weapons being posted.

I would have liked to have finished ‘Traders’ but that does not look like it’s going to happen. The main reason is that I need peace (relatively so) and quiet in order to write. I just don’t have that here. I was able to write about 500 words in total since I arrived. Maybe after the funeral I can write more, I don’t know and we shall see.

As I work on my blogs over the next few weeks I may or may not relay my experiences here in the Philippines. It’s a different culture to be sure, although it has been heavily influenced by the USA. 

I will say this about the country however. As my wife likes to say, ‘It’s more fun in the Philippines’. What she means when she says this is that there are pretty much zero rules here. People see signs and rules, and they more often than not simply choose to ignore them. Here rules – especially those of the road – are more like ‘suggestions’.

Personally for the most part I like the chaos, the randomness of the country. But I know that it can and will wear thin on more than a few occasions while I’m here.

Oh, and my son and I did manage to catch ‘Expendables 3’. Again, why the hell are people bitching about the movie? It’s a brainless action flick, simple as that! Come on people, you should know that before you go in and watch it.

Then again people are idiots.

Anyhow that’s pretty much it for this week. My observations will continue as I get the time to work on the blog over the next three weeks.

I’m currently sitting at 99 likes for my personal author page. It certainly would be nice if I could break that elusive 100 mark before I return home.

And I still have but a single follower on Twitter. I will start posting there if I can get some more followers.

Until next week, peace. 

PS - yes that's my father in law's coffin I'm using as the image for this blog. 

Chris Van Deelen is the author of the Skirmisher Publishing LLC sourcebook Creatures of the Tropical Wastes sourcebook, co-author of its Wisdom from the Wastelands game supplement and contributor to the 'Sword of Kos: Hekaton' Anthology.